J’adore/ J’abhor: the big bikini debate
To bikini or not to bikini? That is the question. Two Muddy editors pull on their swimwear and fight it out. We'll spare you the photos though.
J’adore bikinis, says Muddy founder Hero Brown
I’ll give it to you straight: I believe that to give up bikinis is to give up on life. If I were to finally give in and swap my cute two-piece for a dull, matronly swimsuit, it would mean acquiescing to middle age, to being invisible, to never entertaining the possibility of dancing on a podium in Ibiza again. So it’s a no from me – “Let it all hang out” will be etched onto my gravestone.
I spent several years of my early twenties living in Australia and New Zealand, fully immersed in beach culture, baking in the sunshine in the itsy-bitsiest of expensive bikinis. And so it has always been thus. I prefer a two piece for the minimal tan lines (a flabby tummy looks so much better when it’s brown than white) and to keep me cool in steamy climes – I get hot and bothered when swathed in too much fabric.
That’s not to say my bikini style hasn’t evolved over the years. These days you’re less likely to catch me in flirty ruffles, tiny triangle bras or (god forbid) thong bottoms – I wouldn’t be that cruel to my cringing children. Instead, I prefer a well-upholstered, well-cut styles in decent fabrics – Boden’s range is always a winner, Next is surprisingly good too with a vast range for all body shapes and & Other Stories are worth a look – they use normal-sized models too so extra brownie points. I’ll be lightly toasting in the garden if you need me.
J’abhor bikinis, says Muddy Berks editor Rachel Jane
I’ll leave the bikini to all the ballsy babes out there, thanks very much. I’m a fully paid-up member of Team Swimsuit – the sensible and sassy (yes, you read that right, they can be sassy) option – and this lady ain’t for turning. The one-piece swimsuit has been a supportive summer sidekick for as long as I can remember, reliable, fun, flirty and failsafe. It’s kept the girls tethered, creates a silhouette that I’m happy to reveal to the world, and even makes the body bits I don’t like look pretty damn good.
My love affair with the one-piece started at the age of seven when my mum bought me a bright green costume with a petal leaf skirt. It was the coolest thing I have ever owned and I didn’t want that summer to ever end. Since then I’ve flirted with tankinis (seriously, what’s the point?) and retro-style high waisted two-pieces but I always feel like a fashion fraud. They’re just not me. Swimsuits have a reputation for being boring, but there’s plenty of super-stylish inspiration out there courtesy of ‘70s style icons like Farrah Fawcett and Bo Derek to modern gals Beyoncé and Bella Hadid. So much more chic than letting it all hang out – and let’s not forget you can actually swim in them without risking indecently exposing yourself to everyone else around the pool. A price worth paying for a no-tan tummy, I reckon.
What about you? To bikini or not to bikini? Tell us in the comments box!
Time to shop! Clickety click for the Muddy edit of this summer’s hottest swimwear.